I will definitely try to use the moment into the next, but sometimes my brain does not allow that and it focuses entirely on breaking down. I'm really sorry all that stuff happened to you, it really sounds like you went through so much. That sounds pretty scary but you managed to do something pretty surprising with alot of inner strength.

I do go to therapy and see a psychiatrist but so far the medication isn't helping so much at all...I think chemically speaking I am the most damaged, it just won't logically put itself together...