Quote:
Originally Posted by Echos Myron
I truly think that these feelings towards our therapists can be both; I love him as a person, for who he is, but I know these feelings have only emerged because he has fulfilled needs for me that have been unmet throughout my life. So it is transference, but that doesn't mean it isn't genuine love.
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What you said here really gets to the crux of the matter, I think. I think a non-genuine feeling would be one that the therapist had done nothing to elicit, that is, if, say, you felt they were evil because they sharpened a pencil because in the past you experienced trauma whenever pencils were sharpened, then yes, that would be transference.
But, if a therapist fills a deep need that you have, I don't see how that is transference. That is a real and present actual event which is happening, and to deny the feelings that arise, or call them something other than what they are seems to be an effort to diminish them and maybe protect the therapist, possibly to the detriment of the client (who is basically gaslit about their experience.)