I have a lot of suicidal ideation but no significant intent. I have a theoretical plan but I haven't actively made preparations. My psych nurse and pdoc take that quite seriously as there is the concern that it wouldn't take much on my part to think "*** it, I may as well". I don't want to harm myself and I am as scared as hell of dying, but the ideation is never far away.

It sounds as if you don't have much ideation but maybe you don't value your life or that you feel you shouldn't be here, alive. If that is the case talk those thoughts through with your Pdoc/ T, I think they will give you the chance to explain how grave you feel it is.