Don't feel bad about not yet believing your T about you not being a loser and worthless - mine has been telling me the same thing and so far I have not gotten. There - I can understand intellectually what he is saying - I just haven't "gotten" it internally yet. But I have faith and hope that I will get it - that I will one day wake up and change my mind and realize that I am a good person. So - hang in there. Keep pluggin away at it with your T and your friends - because, way down deep deep inside of us, we know we are OK or we would not still be here. Trust in that still small voice that we can barely hear that you will know your goodness and we are pulling for you to find the right job for you! Kudos to ou for keeping on trying!!!

The vision of your goodness will sustain me through the cold
Take my hand now to remember when you find yourself alone
You are never alone… (John Denver)
Mars