I have a daughter who is 14 years old. Her mother does not pay much attention to her. So raising her falls for the most part on my shoulders. I have my mood swings, and do things that do not make sense. During these periods of time, I am not as available to her as much as I want to be. For instance, when I cannot focus and I am depressed and she comes to me for help with her studies, I find during these times I cannot help her. I am not there when she needs help. I promise her that I will make important things happen for her. But much of the time I find it very difficult to follow through with my promises even though much of the time they eventually get done by me.

I feel that she cannot depend on me just like she cannot depend on her mother. I feel very sad about this. I did take my daughter to my pdoc to help her understand that I have mood swings and sometimes do goofy things. But I think this is no excuse for not being there for her and making a positive difference in her life.

What can I do? I am working with my pdoc towards stability. But I am afraid I am coming across lazy and unreliable. She should not have to deal with this in her life. What do people in my situation do to be there for their family? Maybe I am lazy and unreliable?

PS: After further thought, it looks like I am the one that is having difficulty accepting my illness. But what does my daughter think of me? Can I be the father I want to be for my daughter.