I concur. I am 57 and just recently exposed my innermost secrets to my T - just as ghastly as what you described and I also applaud you, Ozze for being brave enough to get help now. And, also for the record, I have been married now for 33 years and doing OK with my meds. Meds and therapy are the key to escaping the anxiety trap.

The vision of your goodness will sustain me through the cold
Take my hand now to remember when you find yourself alone
You are never alone… (John Denver)
Mars