Moose,

I can definitely relate to you. I am experiencing much of the same thing. I don't know if it is because of the holidays, but I am thinking that my case is caused more because of being on too little medication. What I am doing is trying to get by minute by minute, because that is as far forward as I can think right now. I keep telling myself just to get through the next minute to see if maybe one of the future minutes will be better. I don't have a lot of hope right now, but I am hanging on to each minute. So far, it is working for me.
Also, I am so glad you posted your thoughts and feelings, because it helps me to feel not so alone, which helps to improve my mood and thoughts. I hope that I can do the same for you. You are not alone.

I hope I don't sound too crazy and hope my coping strategy will help you as well.

Spincera