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I'm worried that she's going to fall into old patterns around this guy (whom I don't know at all),
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Would you actually leave her over something that has not happened yet but you worry could happen?
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I don't want to have to end things here, because the vast majority of this relationship is amazing
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You will never find a relationship in which 100% of it is amazing.
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and has actually facilitated a lot of healing for me,
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I bet you can heal even further, if you allow yourself to stay with her.
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but I most certainly cannot tolerate cheating, even on an emotional level.
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What sorts of emotional expressions will you be willing to tolerate from her?
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and she reprimanded herself in her writing for doing that (implying to me that it's an unconscious thing that she would slip into if she isn't
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I read this passage quite differently.
Would you rather that she did not put it in writing, that she did not reprimand herself, but that she freely spoke to the ex and had no second thoughts about it?
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Sometimes I find [underlying anxiety] rather crippling, in that when something triggers it I can't even concentrate at work for several hours at a time.
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This quite striking image does give pause. It may be that you are not sufficiently healed to be in a relationship at this time.
Let us say that you have a great fear that your girlfriend will get hit by a car. Does this mean that from now on she can never cross the street? Or does it rather mean that you need to continue with therapy so that your fears continue to subside?