You can break this cycle... You have to push yourself to engage in introspection and dig deep within yourself through self-reflection / contemplation - eventually you will uncover the true source of these behaviors...

Look at the 'self sabotage' as a symptom and not the cause of your struggles. On the surface one might say, "Well I just need to stop this self-sabotaging behavior".... But if the behavior is the symptom, then only focusing on controlling the symptom will not resolve the matter, as it will spring up again. You need to identify and address the true cause/source that is responsible for creating these symptoms (behaviors). When I say 'cause/source' - think along the lines of unprocessed emotional energy connected to earlier life experiences that may have been suppressed/repressed due to being too difficult to acknowledge and release at the time of those experiences. Once you go through the process of identifying, acknowledging (experiencing) and releasing those 'blockages' - the symptom (self-sabotaging behavior) will dissolve away. I don't know your personal history so this may be something that you could seek the help of a counselor/therapist to assist you with - or a compassionate listener in your life. Just trying to provide you with a very general outline of how the healing process typically plays out.

Hang in there and never give up. Keep pushing yourself forward and you will navigate your way through this life challenge and have strengthened and refined yourself for having done so.