Hey all I get what you all are saying and I understand, and I think you are right I probly was just something that I needed to do I have felt like screaming at every one for a very long time and I guess it just came out then, and in that fashion I still have no explanation for the why I did it but I know that I did, even my friends dont understand the why, but I guess that is why I am here in the first place to figure out what is wrong with me. Thanx again all for posting replies.