I am sorry this causes you so much pain. I agree with Stopdog and brokenwarrior. I lived a life in the distant past trying, begging, pleading, blackmailing, etc. someone to get them to get the help they desperately needed. I tried to get them involuntarily committed more than once. It never did any good. If someone doesn't want help or doesn't want to change, nothing you can do can help them, no matter how much you may love them. I'm so sorry this is hurting you so.