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Originally Posted by justdesserts
that you wish you didn't know? Being in therapy has helped me see how bad my marriage is. Before therapy I really had so sense of self or personhood and lived to please other people, including (mainly) my husband. Now I see how unhealthy some of our dynamics are and how much they hurt me and it's really hard because the more I try to change and find my own voice, the more my husband resists and the more complicated our relationship becomes. I know I'm making healthy changes for me, but it's made my marriage very hard. Has anyone ever experienced anything like this? How did it work out? I love my husband very much and want our marriage to work in spite of the current stress. FWIW, my husband is emotionally closed and in denial about their being any problem with anyone but me.
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hi justdesserts, I reluctantly began therapy about a year ago as recommended by my pdoc for increased stress related to caregiving. Eventually my marital problems and past csa problems came out! It was very difficult to admit but I was close to leaving him. We had drifted so far apart because we didn't know how to communicate and I harbored such resentment against him from emotional abandonment during a difficult time in my life. I was also dealing with past hurts I never shared. long story short the therapy pretty much saved our marriage.It took almost a year for me to turn things around. It's not perfect but our disagreements are not as violent! Good luck
I hope it works out for you!