This is sort of long, but if anyone reads this and can relate to this or feels similar frustration your input will be appreciated, sometimes It feels like i am the only one, but I know that is not true...probably.

Well not the entire world, the trees certainly aren't causing any problems...suppose more human caused crap. For one I find the current 'society' here quite repulsive to say the least and the current pop culture, ick...even the damn history channel is full of freaking reality shows...and the vast majority of current popular music.

Then there is the system and the government and of course I am very unhappy about lots of things concerning that. Don't want to debate about it but seems a lot of things are really going downhill and escalating in a bad way just over-all...and its not looking much better in much of the rest of the world either. The class division is ridiculous, what kind of a civilized nation has people who have enough money to last them 10 lifetimes as well as people living on the streets...then of course various laws and policies to make things harder for those people. You know in my city they took out a lot of rain shelters at bus stops, probably wasted tax money on this...bullcrap just trying to make it more uncomfortable to be outside whether its by choice or because you've got nowhere to go.

And this concern about police brutality, well its not just something off in the distance I hear about on the news...its in my own back yard, just this last week I saw a rather disturbing video recorded in Denver, a place I have been plenty of times where a bunch of cops rushed a rather small group of protestors quite brutally i might say...and in such a way that any passerby's not even part of the protest would have been at risk of being trampled or brutalized. It disturbed me....not sure where I am going with all this but I am just disturbed and afraid of the system we happen to live under...no idea what to do about it.

I can't just ignore it, and not be bothered? can't seem to do that...but what can one even do. And also how the hell am I supposed to recover from my mental health issues....its not use when the environment you're stuck in drags you down all the time. Also isn't it nice how if you are on SSI, its pretty much set up to where you can't even save up to maybe invest in some way to come off of it and become self sufficient financially.