The situation you're in must feel awful, but when I was first diagnosed BP 1 a few things... It took a long time to get my meds straight. Everyone is different and reacts differently to medication and getting them adjusted to your personal situation is pretty much a trial and error scenario. That's why they say being a doctor is a "practice." But I firmly believe that most doctors know what they're doing.

Also, I didn't realize what it felt like to be "normal" until they finally got my meds right. But still, I'll ramp up to manic, down into a depression, mixed states, etc. but now we know how to tweak the meds when things start to change. But you need to catch things when they first start to change or, like you're experiencing now, things can get a little dangerous (not sleeping, spending money, bad judgement, etc.)

Hang in there Mkrooks1.