I have quite a rare bone condition thats called Pectus Excavatum or funnel chest. During my life, this thing spoiled my self-esteem for good, i always had very strong insecurity because of it, always felt like defective person compared to other boys.
Never went to beach, sauna or any kind of acitivity that required being topless. I was avoiding being in intimite relationships with girls for that reason until 20 years old. Then i met girl and we were dating for 2 years. Before she dumped me, she said that she didn't care about my chest, but she told me a lot of lies, so i don't really believe her statement.
Now i started to visiting the gym and found out that with growing muscles, this thing developed tendency to look even worse than before.
I realized that the only way to change this thing is doing operation, which is extremely dangerous, expensive and painful. It actually might lead to death, life-long trauma, partly disability and many other things.
So, considering all that, im think that i wont ever be brave enough to do it.
And instead i got to accept that i never will have an attractive body, no matter how much i will go to gym trainings. I will never experience admiring glances from girls like other boys do. Okay, its got be more to life, right? So i have no other choice but accept it.
And then it comes to main goal that i need to achieve. Very often i just feel it under my shirt and feel inferior. Its hard to explain, when you are just feeling your defect without even looking at it, and you mood is going down. I should learn how to stop letting this thing affect my self-esteem. Is it possible? Is here anyone with experience of something like that?