I know about TENS machines (read up on them years ago when i was pregnant), but unfortunately i don't have one, nor any money to hire/buy one.

Struggling with endless physical pain. It's so intense at times i can't sleep, think, eat, focus. All i can do is cry. Get dizzy spells which is frightening. Scared i'm going to pass out and fall down the stairs.

Struggling with emotional pain, too. And flashbacks.

Missing my son, although also glad he's having a great time on holiday. I'm not much use to him at the moment as i can't run around or play like i usually do, so it's good he's still getting to do all those things with his dad and their friends.

Hoping to get a check-in email from T on Monday. He said to email as much as i need to, but i've only sent one since his last one as it feels pointless, and a waste of his reading time, to say the same thing - i'm in pain! - over and over again, especially when a) he knows, and b) there's nothing he can do.

In an attempt to end on a positive note, at least i have chocolate, cricket on the radio, a pile of crosswords, a good book, and text updates and photos from son & his dad.