like you said, he is trying to make it look like he hasnt abandoned the family. documenting everything, you never know what is going to come in useful when it comes to court. he seems to want to show that he has continued to support the family so you cannot say otherwise. the wisest choice, if you truely dont want this marriage anymore is to contact a GOOD divorce lawyer. if you have been at home taking care of the kids, the lawyer can make it so he needs to leave the home, pay the bills, and pay the atty fees as well. welcome to psych central. you will find we have several forums where you can post about your concerns and receive feedback from other members. you will get a lot of support here. again, welcome