I'm really tired, mentally/emotionally particularly, and what I'm saying seems dumb and fragmented. So sick of trying to climb this mudslide... the sun never comes out long enough for the mud to dry so I can make it up. So anhedonic, cleared up some as I came out of the hospital, but it's growing again, and I'm tired of not feeling, or even caring too much. It occured to me yesterday that I don't think I'd care much if anyone I know were to die... that's pretty horrible. It's not that I hate or particularly dislike anyone I know... I just don't care, I'm numb to real feeling. And I feel distant and solitary from any human connection, like an island that's unaffected, half-oblivious to the surrounding turmoil. Entirely on autopilot, living mechanically.
It's so tiring and living feels so meaningless like this.

<font color=green>____________________________
Matthew 11:28
Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.</font color=green> Sounds good...