Quote:
Originally Posted by theantiquatedhousew
I am so sorry. I am also sorry if this comes out the wrong way, but you have to take care of yourself and not worry about him. No one knows the whole story but the two of you. If he gave you several different reasons 'why' and then got an apartment without telling you and invited your roommates to join him - let him go. If you feel you need counseling - seek it. But only for you. At the very least give yourself time to breathe and think about what you want without his influence. Do you feel like he is being honest in seeing a counselor or just saying that to appease you? Take it from a woman who should have run a long time ago - if it feels wrong, it is wrong. I believed the lies because I wanted to believe him. As I look back I always knew he was full of it. I lost 20 years because I wanted it to be right. Don't give up another week of your life to someone if it doesn't feel right. Why does he think he has the right to decide how you live? You roommates agreed to this? How awful. Why does he get to decide your timeline? Decide for yourself!!!!! I cannot stress that enough..I have a husband who thinks he has the right to tell me what my new years resolution should be! And it started by him telling me how things were going to go....please please don't let him do that!
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i've been looking intensively for a small studio apartment just to get out. i can't even think right now considering i'm surrounded by OUR bedroom, OUR living room, etc. I told him i am incapable of giving him an answer as to whether i want to continue, and oddly enough he is totally offended. I literally just told him that my new first priority is me. i'm also my second priority and my third, as well. everything else will have to fall in place after that. I need to breathe. I need to be alone. I also need to figure out how I'm going to afford a new apartment, final bills and rent on the house, and a moving van for my bed. i do believe he's serious about counseling, but why now? while living apart for the next 13 months or so? i don't think it's worth it. additionally the roommate we have that is my friend i guess didn't want to live with the roommate i hate and my boyfriend, which means that the two of them will be living together by themselves. I had actually just about a month ago called my boyfriend out on the fact that he was suddenly spending so much time with the roommate i hate and just absolutely bending over backwards to do anything and everything for him that i felt it was emotional infidelity. all of our intimate, personal relationship details, my boyfriend discussed with this low life. he stewed for a few days over that and then came at me with all the reasons why i was being stupid about it and i was wrong, end of story. that's not exactly how that works. then he sneaks around and they get an apartment together? nope. i don't think i can do this. i'm terrified of being in a humongous city all by myself with not a single person to talk to, but i'd rather do that i think then be made to feel the way i have. Thanks so much for listening, i am so happy i found this site. finally have people to talk to!
