I have been waiting to vent out for the last few days... but as i have cut all contact with everyone i have ever known, this is a question i have not heard... yet within me i have wanted to shout out loud...

Last year i spent New Years with my fiance watching London fireworks on TV... we started 2014 together, in eaxh others arm... we made promises together... saw a future together... we also decided a name for our child whenever we had one... Last new year has been the best new year ever...

This year... I am spending it all alone... locking myself away from the world... just me and my memories... this year i have no dreams... no resolutions... no ambitions... i have noone... A new year with myself and my Disorder...

I dont plan on sitting with a bottle counting the mins down... i dont plan on welcoming 2015 in any way or form... instead it will just be another night going into another day... there is nothing special about new years anymore...

Lets shed our final tear,
I wish you all Happy New Year...


Lets shed our final tear,
I wish you all Happy New Year...