I am trying to look for a part time job that is permanent but every time I find something that might work I panic. I start to think that I won't be able to go every day or on the days I am supposed to be there. I had a job for two decades but was laid off. Toward the end I barely was able to get there. It was a struggle every morning. It was mostly anxiety but also I just didn't want to have to be some where. I just didn't want the responsibility anymore. I have had jobs all my life and now I can't bring myself to apply because I can't guarantee that I will show up. I don't know what to make of it.