I wonder if perhaps having boundaries that are too restrictive can make it easier to slip into very loose boundaries if something serious happens. My therapist has occasionally called to check up on me after what he thought were difficult sessions (like twice in 5 years), we have occasionally met outside therapy for professional events, and we hug pretty often, but he would never offer to do my grocery shopping (and I wouldn't want him to) and he has boundaries that he doesn't give up on ... some I agree about, some I don't, and many are unspoken, but with most things he is constant. He doesn't call too much or offer more help than I need and feel comfortable receiving. Reading your post, I'm just wondering about this change in your therapist's boundaries and rigid versus loose boundaries.

Sorry if it sounds like I'm rambling