Quote:
Originally Posted by Mastodon
That assumes that you know that you can do a good job of prioritising, though; there is a third option, which is genuinely not knowing whether something is important or a waste of time.
My T does not want me to spend my energy on prioritising, because for me, that becomes self-censorship. And almost anything can be important in therapy, too. It's one of the ways in which therapy is different from real life. Most of my thoughts and feelings are irrelevant when I am with other people, and I learnt at a very early age that being quiet was the way to be safe. The latter is not true in the same way now that I'm an adult, but it is always a safer option to be quiet when in doubt. But in therapy, those irrelevant thoughts and forbidden feelings are suddenly not unimportant, for 45 minutes, and then they become unimportant again. Small wonder I'm confused about it all.
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You make an excellent point. Part of my problem is simply opening my mouth to speak. I too learned as a small child that my best option was to keep quiet, so talking about me and my feelings does not come easy. I think this would be a good think to bring up to my t at our next session. I may even bring along this thread to help me explain it.