So basically:

When the anxious attachment style feels that something is not right in their relationship their attachment system activates. The attachment system is a mechanism in the brain that is responsible for monitoring and tracking the safety and availability of our attachment figures. Even the slightest hint that something is wrong will trigger the anxious person’s attachment system. This triggering highjacks the brain and reestablishing connection to their partner becomes the main priority. Once their attachment system is activated, they cannot calm down until they have clear indication from their partner that s/he is truly there and the relationship is safe. Once their partner responds in a way that reestablishes security, they revert back to their calm, normal self.

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I am triggered but refusing to give in to needing other to fill the urge because its a bottomless pit.

But self soothing is not working...