He ended up this time. I think I fed his ego. So many times, I wanted to end it up but he was sad and we got back together.

It was really bad. We took a trip with his kids and his 9 years old daughter were such a little brat in the entire trip. Nothing made this child happy. She complained about everything. She shout at his father "WHAT? You brought me to this hotel. I don't like it." or another time "I want a fancier restaurant"....or so many other long unhappy faces, very jealous.
We went to my sister's home and she has two sweet kids, a boy and a girl, 9 and 10. Kids were playing the whole day. My niece is a sweet heart. She never gets into any trouble and she let the kids to play with her toys, same as my nephew.
But oh mother of lord, this girl was not happy. I took her to nail salon, she's not happy still. His son was sweet, appreciating every moment.
When she complained about the 4.5 starts hotel in San Fransisco, I spoke up. I said you should say thanks to your father to spend all these money for just you. Nobody wanted to come to San Fransisco, except you, but nothing makes you happy. Richard, my boyfriend, was quiet. later on, he said, it's ok, she's just a child. I said that's the parents job to teach a kid to say thanks and appreciate.
Anyhow, the long story short, on the day four, the last day of the trip, we were in the science center for them, and around 5:30 I'm tired. I want to go.
They are running around, and not even waiting for me. Basically, I stay behind. They don't care. They don't wait. He doesn't even bother himself to look back and see if I exist. I got so pissed at him when specially they didn't wait for me and left me behind a closed door. I texted him "What do you call yourself? You don't even wait for me." When I saw him, He said "everybody is happy except you....look kids, who is unhappy...Marjan"...and he pointed his finger at me. This is bullying! I got mad and I told him you are a A.H....and I left (I just used the acronym). I sat outside waiting for them.
We got into the car, again the little brat is blaming me for losing some **** (ipod, ipad whatever **** they are playing with). I said I toss it in the garbage!
I bought the iPad and I'm the only one who's not using it. It turns to be their toys. He found it and gave it to me.
Then he said again "Look guys who is sad here and miserable....oh just Marjan". I felt I get heart attack! I told him, leave me alone, give me few minutes of peace.
After around an hour, I needed to go to bathroom. I asked him to make a stop in the next exit. He said nothing but he didn't stop and he passed the exit. I told him I really need to go, don't miss the next exit. He starts screaming at me and stopped the car at the entrance of the freeway. Made me to drive the whole night.
He screamed at me many times right in front of his kids. I told him don't do it at least in front of them. But he couldn't help himself.
Anyhow.....we went to the hotel....I start trying to soften the situation. I told him it's ok if you want to break up but don't make it ugly like this. We don't need to say hurtful things together.....
Anyhow, in the morning, the mean behavior continued. He was laughing with his kids and again saying that "hey kids, who is sad between four of us....it's her...Marjan.".....I've never got bullied like this even at elementary school!
so...I drove them back to my home where his dirty car was...he took some of his stuff and he wanted to come back for few piece of furniture he has. I told him "No, you can't disturb me tonight. I had enough of you and your kids. I need rest. I'll let you know when to come and pick them up."
I let his kids to come in and open their gifts. Then they left. I closed the garage door. but it didn't take them two minutes, to come back again. This time, his daughter is yelling and shouting at my door and kicking the door. I didn't want to see them again. I didn't open the door. I could hear that "She's yelling saying that Daddy, Marjan Doesn't open the door." in a very demanding rude manner. She lost her iPod and she was blaming me for it. I never see her iPod. It was with her the whole trip. She's a messy girl!
They waited for awhile. I took shower and they were still there. I didn't answer his text message either. I don't want the guy who treat me like a ****.
I put up with his nasty life for a long time. I've been so unhappy. And now, he's breaking up with me right at the new year!
Last year, he made the Christmas and New Year miserable and this year the same.
Now, all I need recovery.
I try not to think the lonely days and not to think about the good days that I had with him and not to think about the unknown future.
I think the main thing I'm afraid of is not finding a person to love and being alone. I'm not sure how to overcome this fear.
I know the time that I overcome these two main fears, I will be happy.

Thanks for your support
Marjan