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Originally Posted by Nature1968
Have you told your husband that your thinking about divorce and if so what did he say ?
Was he always like this or did something happen along the way in the marriage ?
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I tend not to threaten him, so no. I don't think he has a clue that I might actually need to leave except you would think demanding couples counseling was a strong message. We used to be much closer, so something happened along the way I feel, or we just got comfortable.
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Originally Posted by Webgoji
I was wondering this myself. Sometimes depression or something will lead to that disconnection.
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We're both depressed, so yeah that could be it.
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Originally Posted by The Skeezyks
Hello Petra5ed: I wanted to add a couple of thoughts here. They may, or may not be relevant. First, I just want to say that I get the impression there's allot more going on here than simply a lack of emotional connection & physical contact. Perhaps I'm wrong...
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Skeezyks, thanks. I think to some extent you are right. We're middle aged and have been together for a decade, a lot of the excitement is gone. We're rather boring people in some ways. I also like my space, and I've "let him get away" with this for a long time. The problem for me is I don't feel loved anymore. Maybe I am insecure, or maybe he is too distant, I just don't know. Whatever it is, the one theme seems to be that he is very content with the status quo, and I am not. I.e. I'm looking to have needs met that aren't being met for me anymore, and I'm weighing my options. Maybe that sounds harsh, but it is what it is. Men might all fall into the inattentive category at some point, but that doesn't mean I need to put up with it for the rest of my life either. Plus, I feel like my husband is on the extreme end of most men. It wouldn't take much time or effort usually to make me happy, but it's the lack of any effort that is killing me emotionally.