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Originally Posted by seraphic
I'm glad the talk went well! Having feelings out in the open can help a lot.
Can you tell what her feelings are on her relationship with her boyfriend (positive, negative, ambivalent)? Even if she loves her boyfriend, that doesn't mean the relationship itself is going well, necessarily. It sounds like she's in a difficult place right now, and she may even not be sure about how she feels or what she wants from you. The best you can probably do I think is be supportive of her, but if you feel like you need/want to pull back for any reason, allow yourself to do that.
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Yeah the talk did go well when we had it. I was expecting her to immediately recoil and say something like, I don't feel the same. But she never did. So I feel like there is this missing conversation piece somewhere.
Funny you should mention about her boyfriend. He's in town for this week, staying with her until Friday or Saturday. Last night she texted me, extremely upset, feeling like she wasn't herself around him, and that all she wanted to do was cry and give me a hug. She basically said she was feeling like her space was invaded and that she doesn't want to be physical with him at all.
I tried to console her, and I did well with it, but something in me is like "what does this mean?" Aside from the distance between them, things seem to be ok from what she's relayed.
I want to be supportive and I have been, but there is a part of me that thinks there's something wrong if he's here and she doesn't want to spend time with him. Idk...Like you said, I think she's in a tough spot and I understand that. I'm just not sure that I am going to be able to do this much longer. Not because I don't care about her, but because it's too complicated. I isolate very easily and I feel like I want to pull back from our relationship all together. I know things will change once he leaves, but I'm not sure that makes it any better, just easier.
Thank you again for talking through this with me!