Cutting was never an actual "problem" for me, really. I started after a rape attempt, but it never got really bad because soon after I started, my mom said she wanted me to get a physical, and I was terrified of the doctor seeing scars, so I just stopped. I guess I controlled it before it got out of control. That was probably close to 3 years ago.

I have started again. I don't know exactly what drove me to do it. I think I wanted to get rid of my emotional pain, and for me it sort of makes me feel better. The pain is focused on my cut, instead of in my mind. I know this is bad. I don't know what to do about it. There's no way I would ever tell my mom about it. It's not a suicide attempt, but I know from a past suicide attempt that when you do attempt suicide, doctor patient confidentiality is broken and they can tell people, like my mother, what's going on. If I tell my therapist about this, will she consider it a suicide attempt? Will she be able to tell my mother? I'm scared to keep doing this, but I'm scared to tell anyone to get help for it. My mom would just get angry with me, and that would make me want to do it more..