yea i just told him. most of my chest pain is from panic attacks and anxiety but the past two months its sometimes been hurting for no reason and its been worse this month. but i also had a lot of deep panic this month and last month too so idk. after my aunt died ive been going downhill. before she died i was doing pretty good. still had flareups but not as much. was rarely hearing voices before she died but this month its been everyday. and seeing things everyday. still paranoid but getting more delusional i suppose. i hate that word. this month has been the worst for me than in the past 6 months. the beginning of the year and end has been bad but the middle was kinda ok.

im afraid im going to die. its like sometimes i want to die but i want it to be on my terms. nothing is great about dying unexpectedly or by the hands of someone else.

now im just on a tangent sorry...

my chest hurts now but idk if its from anxiety. i ate a poptart and slim jim this morning.