Mefisto if I was having a party you would be invited!

I know you are feeling down given the circumstances but try not to place too much importance on this particular night. New Years gatherings are a completely forgettable cultural tradition. Usually just lots of drinking and then short-lived anticipation for all of 10 minutes and then it's over... Not much different than any other weekend night really when you consider what goes on... No one goes out for New Years and then reminisces about it afterwards.... It's really insignificant and forgettable...

Find a nostalgic movie that you like, or something that makes you laugh, and spend some time watching that.... Start a new book, read someting that challenges you to question the way you think about things. Do you have any family or relatives you can reach out to or spend time with?