Quote:
Originally Posted by Echos Myron
I felt that too with some of the things my T said. ("One day you'll have to kill me off. You have to own that" while at the same time telling me he's still close to his former therapist).
Actually I think he was just insensitive, and your T's comment sounds quite similar. Like a really clumsy way of reminding us (as if we needed reminding!) that the relationship is finite and professional. Probably not intended to hurt but perhaps naïve on our Ts' part.
It's great you have another T to fall back on who already knows you. My new T is having to sort of fill in the gaps himself because I'm so keen to get on with processing the transference that I'm not giving him a chance to get to know me.
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Hm, that's an interesting comment he made. It's funny because most children never have to kill off their parents. We might separate, but kill off? I think having a therapist is a poor substitute. Really poor. Maybe that's why I'm so angry. I was so ripped off and he's unrelenting lately at throwing it in my face. Every session a good dose of it is about how much he loves his real kids.
My therapist has also told me he keeps in close touch with his ex-therapist. He's made several vague comments that could be construed as if we might one day be friends, like "you should meet my friend so and so and ask her this..." or "we should go for lunch here" and even "I'll always talk to you." But maybe it's feelings he's had on a whim of the moment, and the next week he sees me and thinks oh great here we go again, let's reiterate to her this is a business relationship, I'll make sure to point out how she's not a real friend, she's not a kid of mine. Meanwhile I get it, I don't need him to tell me because I truly get it.