I told my friend that I was suicidal and after some begging from her, I finally allowed her to tell my T. She use to go to her before, as well. She emailed her and told her that I needed help and my T wanted to see me today, so I went. I told her 95% of how bad it is. She wanted to tell my mom and possibly get me in a hospital, but I was able to talk her out of doing either. I'm seeing her Friday again and she made me promise to go, and I can't break promises. But I am really worried about this weekend. I don't know if I can fight anymore. I just wish all of this could go away...