My T was talking to me about it, but I don't think I can do that. I just can't go behind my mom's back and be put on meds. Won't it be put on my medical record? I don't think I want that... I will be seeing T on Friday, and if I can't make the promise to come back on Monday, I don't know what she will do. The biggest thing is that I while I know I need help, I don't particularly want it, as I just don't think I can be helped anymore. I got it anyway, and now it's making me feel trapped. My mom won't understand if I tell her as she has a lot on her plate too at the moment. Plus, even though our past wasn't all that good, we survived and now we are at a better place. She won't be able to understand why I feel this way. I don't even know why I feel this way.