Thanks 8888an8888 and Ruftin.

I'm feeling a little better today. I think it's confusing, because I do ok without therapy (I get along with people, I hold down a job, etc.) But, not great - it's definitely not the life I want (not dating at all, not very many friends or much socializing, lots of stress and random bouts of depression). Plus my family is nuts.

So, I think I could survive without therapy, but I really want to get all my childhood crap fixed as much as that's possible. And honestly, we haven't even really started on that, because I'm still working on feeling safe with T (apparently).

So, I'm not taking a break. I think you guys were right, it was partially a depressed thing (stayed in bed for a couple days), and partly just not feeling any kind of connection (and not being able to keep a clear picture of my T in my head). It's not fun, but I really appreciate being able to come and talk it out here, because there's nobody in "real life" that gets it. And this helps.

(I think some of it is the "disorganized attachment" stuff as well. I probably need to talk to him about that, at some point. I think it's why I want to run away after like... every 2 or 3rd session! )

*Thanks!*