Quote:
Originally Posted by arsenal99
Hi,
I'm new on this forum and this is really haunting me right now.
This is actually the most open I've ever been regarding speaking about my depression.
I can't talk to family or friends as I know they can't understand what's been haunting me for almost a decade and exasperated in 2014.
To me, I've always felt what's the point of celebrating new year's but this time it's actually much worse.
Last year was actually like a dark, long hollow tunnel. Now no one close to me died or anything that traumatic but it's almost been like hell. I prefer not to go further into it.
I haven't been to a psychologist or been diagnosed with any sort of depression but from what I've looked up and some of the quizzes I've taken, it seems like I may be suffering from depression since the age of 10 without even knowing it.
I feel 2015 is gonna be a repeat of last year where it might be another meh year. Sounds pessimistic but I sat there thinking "what's the point" and wow "I'm actually alive in 2015, smh."
So, how do I get out of this? I know it's not some quick fix as I've had been dealing with a sort of detachment from positive thinking since the age of 10.
Anything appreciated,
Thanks
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Hi Arsenal99,
I too suffer from depression (undiagnosed) and no how tiring it is when the general expectancy from a new year is that you change and things become very different when in fact you just feel like the same trapped person ready to start a different year in the same way. I'm certainly not an expert on how to change the way you feel as I'm pretty bad at it to be honest, but I can tell you what I plan to do In hopes that maybe you can do it too. My plan is to not "expect" anything. No rapid personal development or positive change. Why? I think It's a sure way to be disappointed. The only thing I WILL do is change small behaviours that I think encourage my depression. So for me, stressing and worrying incessantly, staying isolate, putting myself down and thinking extremely pessimistically and negatively. I'l probably try to be more active. Will I fail, maybe, but this year unlike any other, I'm probably going to keep trying. I use words such as "probably" and "maybe" because again, I have no expectations. So that's my advice, don't expect too much, if anything, expect a struggle and really crappy relapse into depression, but be persistent make small lifestyle changes so even if 2015 is the year you struggle to change you can enjoy that improvement in later years. I'l be right alongside you doing the same thing.
Best of luck
