i just can't. I used to be strong. But mental abuse by my family destroyed me. Now its about 5 am here. My dog started to act strange, walk strange, had heavy breathing. I got so scared. Shaked. Told my mother we should take him to vet. But she instead yelled at me its my fault that sth wrong with my dog. Rest of family woke up and yelled at me too. Everything always is my fault im only one to blame coz i don have a job so its my fault. Ive told pdoc about this mental abuse. He said only ur adult, move out. How am i supposed to when i dont have money even for food. When i have so heavy panic attacks and agorafobia i can't go outside. When any of meds didt work for me. My heart hurts. My forearms hurts. Cant stop crying. Cant stop shaking. My body is so heavy i cant get up. My hands are so numb i barely typing.