I am a professional and am bipolar depressive. I have a job, I don't spend money I don't have, and well I have a nice life. I function in everyday life. I wake up because I have to work and support myself. However, I feel like unless I have a trip planned to go travel or have to get ready to go to work I don't give a .....about much of anything. I just sleep to pass time or drink alcohol to give me a small feeling of euphoria. I don't do drugs except the ones I'm prescribed. I absolutely suck when it comes to any type of romantic intimate relationship. I can't keep one because I always want out and feel overwhelmed. I'm a loner because I've had a lot of loss and don't have much family around....sometimes, I feel like what's the .....point. I love my father and I love my sister, but religion has drove my father and I apart and divided our once strong bond. Time has made my sister's and I relationship less close. I have tried to work on both, but have come to realize, those relationships will never be the same as they once were. I feel angry, pain, sad, and sometimes hopeless. I make a good friend but have no interest in many friends; people can't be trusted/they hurt you. Relationships of the intimate type I always sabotage. Anybody else have this problem??? I feel peace when I'm alone ...and spend most of my free time alone....but sometimes, even people like me need .....want to feel