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Old Jan 03, 2015, 04:49 PM
PaulaS PaulaS is offline
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Member Since: Oct 2014
Location: Spain
Posts: 344
Iīm in the category of "non-daters" and the ones that have lived and still live in some kind of crossing between childhood and adulthood. I know I donīt want to live by myself the rest of my life but at the same time I canīt really put my finger on whatīs missing and I donīt have a clear picture of me involved in a relationship.

Itīs therefore a complex situation and an extensive subject for therapy. I think you have to get to know yourself a bit more and understand why you havenīt had a relationship before you go out dating. I would probably "dare" go on a date but I think itīs important searching for the deeper reasons for not that actively seeking a relationship. Iīve been thinking about asexuality as an explanation but I donīt feel I really fit into discriptions around this condition.


Quote:
Originally Posted by JoeS21 View Post
I'm not clear on whether you are having trouble getting a relationship started, sustaining a relationship once it's started, or both? Do you go on dates that fail to evolve into something more? Do you not go on dates in the first place? This all assumes that you are talking about a romantic relationship, correct me if I'm wrong about that.

How to attract a guy: IMO, the easiest way to attract a guy is to, 1. look attractive, 2. act attractive, and 3. find a way to get him to ask you out or ask him out (at the right time or in the right way).

To address #1, honestly ask yourself if there is anything you could be doing to improve your physical appearance that you are not yet doing. Exercise, clothing-wise, grooming (hair, skin-wise, etc.)?

To address #2, honestly ask yourself if you are the kind of person YOU would like to spend a day with. Is there anything you could fix up quickly? Keep in mind that lots of guys enjoy more concise answers than are typical of some circles of girlfriends. His facial expression, and the timing of it, will give this sort of problem away.

To address #3, if you like a guy, try flirting with him in some little way. Do a little more and a little more until you get a yay or nay reaction. If he wrinkles his nose or seems disgusted, quit. If instead, he shows signs of interest, either keep it up, hint, or make the first move yourself.

Also, as you may be aware, many successful busy people have trouble getting into a relationship because they are so busy and focus on work so much.