oh my god, i'm going through EXACTLY that right now. thank god, you said the right words. i ahev just started dating someone for the first time in eight years and it's been six weeks. i ahve allowed myself to fall in love for i am berating ymself for. i can't handle the possibility of heartbreak so i have been beside myself with grief in aniticipation of being let down or hurt. dating this man is not easy for anyone, but it's hard enough for me to actually like anyone. i've just finished work and am tired so i'm not sure if i'm making a lot of sense. i have never seen myself as married or with some one and now i am i have placed too much importance on it. that in itself is causing me great anxiety. i dread being along, but i've been alone my whole life. i've had to unusual relationship that didn't last longer thasn two months. i'm nearly 33. i found my man by accident on an online professional interest site (not dating). damn that bastard for sucking me in! i am now finding out how %#@&#! hard it is to maintain a relationship (even though we're just dating). it's more than i anticipated and i sometimes feel i'll crack. but i'm gonna push through. i'm gonna take the plunge as i may never again find a man i find as interesting as this one.