hey.

i'm wondering what else might be going on with your marriage. part of figuring out what is going on might be figuring out why you feel attracted to your ex and why you don't feel attracted to your current wife.

what are the dynamics around your ex?

e.g.,

there is no way that you guys are going to do anything?
there is a love - hate thing going on?

dunno...

what are the dynamics around your current wife?

e.g.,

arguing?
fear of intimacy?
mother figure / friend?

usually when marriages are under stress because of performance problems there are OTHER problems too.

do you want to say anymore?