Well, I wasn't all that keen on getting married because it's a hassle and very expensive without any tangible benefits from the actual ceremony. For me, it came down to my husband's family was throwing a stink about us living together unmarried and we planned on spending an indefinite amount of time together.

There are benefits to being married to your partner. For example, if something happens to you or your partner, there aren't as many hoops to jump through to do things like make end of life arrangements and to handle the estate left behind by the deceased. But, you can pretty much get the same effect by making sure you have named your partner as a beneficiary on life insurance or other accounts. If you don't have the paperwork in order, it can still be a nightmare for a spouse to claim accounts left behind by their deceased partner.

Less grim, if you're American and one of you has a job that provides better benefits, you can be part of the plan as a spouse, whereas that isn't an option if you aren't married. For taxes, the maximum income levels are doubled, so you wind up paying less in taxes than if you're single.

Having a wedding CAN be a nice way to celebrate the relationship, but there is absolutely no benefit to taking out a loan to pay for it or going nuts... the wedding gifts you get are absolutely not going to make up for the cost of the wedding.

So, it's a matter of personal preference. My husband and I got married, but we maintain our own identities (neither of us changed our names). There is never any confusion around it and it turns out to be so much simpler than going through the trouble of changing your name (no surprise there). No one really ever asks for the marriage certificate, though when it is required, it becomes a scramble to find the stupid thing.

When it comes down to it, if you really don't plan to get married, you can achieve 90% of the same stuff as married people minus the slight tax benefit. If you make sure your documentation names the other as a beneficiary/emergency contact, then you probably won't have any issues most of the time, even/especially if you have a child. Heck, if you want a ceremony, you can even do a "commitment ceremony" like some couples do. Do what's right for you and yours.