hi badjismo
the thing that stood out to me in your post is that you stated, she no longer asks for it....the first thing that popped into my mind is that maybe she is wanting you to desire her. maybe after having kids she is feeling insecure and undesirable. why not plan a romantic night out for your anniversary. get someone to watch the kids for the evenign, rent a hotel room and show her clearly just how much you want her. just a suggestion. welcome to psych central. you will find we have several forums where you can post about your concerns and receive feedback from other members. you will get a lot of support here. again, welcome