Hello.

When I am manic or hypo-manic I experience paranoia and what I believe are delusions, but they are not so extreme and pronounced, which in a way is good, but in another way, what I experience is really insidious as it can blend in really easily so it is harder to call out.

Something that is really common is that I will begin to think that everyone is against me, I will suspect people of conspiring against me, like co workers, etc... And I will ascribe meaning to talking and laughter in a way that is truly fantastical, yet at the same time, it just seems a little paranoid, it's not like thinking your jesus. Also, in hypo manic states I begin to believe that I have these subtle kinds of super natural powers, so, not like, I can fly or something, but like I can control people, I can exercise some kind of sway over them, like I have a magical ability to influence people's thinking by getting on their wave length, which in a sense is kind of true, but it's not magical, and in these manic states I believe I am magic. But again, it can kind of blend in. BTW, I mainly apply these 'skills' of mine to affect good things, like getting people to get along in a discussion or something, but it's the thinking I'm magic part that is the delusion I think.

I have often wondered if this is even a form of delusion, or if it's just paranoia or being really egotistical. I've always thought that delusional thinking had to be like thinking you are dead, or that the CIA is coming for you, etc... But after researching a bit, it turns out these kinds of things are considered to be a form of delusional thinking, so I thought I'd write in about it cuz it differs a bit from the other things being discussed here, which do sound horrible. So I wish you the best!


MT