Thanks everyone for your replies.

I have a history of borderline personality disorder and depression, and I know that my perspective on relating to other people is a little flawed i.e. I tend to take things way too personally. That said, and recognizing that, I can also sway too far in the other direction of allowing people to walk all over me because I think that "normal" people would be more laid back in a relationship than I would, etc. So I wanted to pose the question to the masses.

I'm better than I used to be with my BPD; it rarely, if ever, gets in the way of my everyday life. But it still gets in the way of my personal life in that I'm still unsure of where to draw boundaries with people. Yes, I've read the books on boundaries people suggested; it's one thing to know about boundaries and another to understand them intrinsically. With my best friend, I know that she likes me. If she didn't, god knows she would have left during one of my four hospitalizations or one of my crazy flip-out's back in the day.

I had an issue happen just today where a friend I've had less than a year flaked out on plans we had tonight. I made plans at her urging--she said she really wanted to hang out with me, so I made plans with her and another friend. Turns out she forgot, and made plans with someone else. This is the third time she's done that. I was like, hey that's kind of disrespectful...if you want to do something with me again, you'll have to do the planning because I'm kind of tired of this s***. She is irritated with me, doesn't see what she's done wrong. Granted, she's much younger than I am and I was pretty flaky at her age as well. So maybe I'm both hard on people and also a little reasonable? I don't know. I'm willing to bend on the text/email/message thing a little, not so much on the flaking out on plans three times thing, lol.