I have fear of having a severe depressive episode again. To counteract that as much as possible, I'm vigilant about medication (and maintenance ECT treatments, at least for now), exercise and therapy. I know there may be breakthrough episodes though so just trying to focus on the positive and, as someone else said, staying in the day is my strategy.

Once I had a diagnosis, I got the proper treatment and had a fighting chance. And I understand the small town dilemma. My hometown is a small town and, yes, people talk. It's an unfortunate reality, but I hope it won't prevent you from seeking treatment.