I'm just speaking out of my mind out of observation over the years. This is only pertaining to my developing social skills and maturation.

What if you can learn and follow everything as normally as other people would except that you can't mature as quickly as others?

I'm not talking about those who choose to be childish or not want to act too much of a grownup, and in some cases I can understand. But for me, I'm trying to act my age which is no problem, but sometimes I slip way too much.

I have a hard time understanding how to live normally, which is strange at this point even, like other teenagers. I mean, I am polite, observant, and mild to others in public, but when I'm around friends and their families or around people who I feel pressured by, I instantly let my meek, childish side seep through.

I remember the times when I'm at one of my closest friend's house (I'm comfortable with them), I used to have either anxiety attacks or accidentally be abnormally childish over small things. When I have these moments, my friends and families would burst out laughing (in their eyes I'm the semi-smart woman who should feel the need to be in a wheelchair, and I really hate this) and I would have no idea why until my mom shouts at me angrily afterwards what I've done wrong. I need to stop being comfortable around familiar people, but I can't!! I don't even know how to act around people I really like anymore!

I never had therapy, but I've tried and I'm trying to fix my mistakes by improving my current mentality with relatives and new people that I like. So far it's working, but with the people now? Hell.

I now accept that I'm mentally slower than others when it comes to developing communication skills and mentality, and with my depression, sometimes I'm not feeling good at all.