I try to remind myself that the ones who do take offense to my wanting to be left alone just don’t understand the stress that comes along with refusing their constant invitations. It isn’t pushing them away. They are simply being pressing and then taking the rejection personally. It is honestly very hard for someone who has not experienced this feeling to know how to approach someone who wants to be left alone. So I choose to forgive them, accept it has nothing to do with me, and move along.


If they keep pressing and telling you that you aren’t making enough of an effort, don’t react or be tempted to get on the defensive. Anyone looking at it objectively would observe and say that we really aren’t making an effort. But it’s because we have absolutely NO ENERGY to make that effort due to our disposition. So if others cannot understand the disposition, or if they tell you that they understand but still want you to snap out of it or suggest it is your fault for not putting in effort...well guess what? It actually isn’t your fault.


What is tricky is trying to ask the other person to change their behavior/approach towards you. Because in their minds, they have done nothing wrong besides try to reach out to you. And really, they haven’t done anything wrong besides…not learn how to interact with you the way you wished they would or could.


I wish the solution was simple. But in all honesty, the best way to get someone to understand the stress you associate with their constant attempts is to communicate with them. If that effort to communicate your thoughts fails, don't feel discouraged. Let it go. You tried.


Just focus on bettering yourself. It’s easy to say “don’t be so hard on yourself” but these situations really aren't our faults. They're just a symptom of the underlying problem which is that we are struggling with depression. By choosing to keep tacking the root of the problem, the symptoms of strained relationships will slowly go away until we are able to interact with other people without all the stress or need to wear a mask. =)