I think for me, learning to recognize and deal with one's feelings, especially the difficult ones like anger, is a livelong process. I have had an especially difficult time in my life with learning tact I use to have only two speeds, "Okay" or "Kill". And, I was afraid of "Kill".

As I have experienced and learned more about anger in general and myself and how I experience anger and when/why, and how to respond as I'd like, I have gotten better about sharing it with others and accepting and helping them with their anger where I'm involved. I still have trouble though in some places and when I get cornered feel "Kill" which frightens me so I avoid or start crying, feeling helpless to solve whatever the problem is in the first place.