To add I understand a bit as I have spent a lot of time waiting for my T to show care the way I want her to and getting hurt when she didn't. I only now realise she was showing me care HER way and I can either accept that care or if it is not acceptable I can move on to someone who can give me what I want.

As it is I have chosen to stay. Her way of caring is actually helpful, stable and normal and I am not used to these things.