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Old Jan 11, 2015, 01:40 AM
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Elkino Elkino is offline
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Member Since: Sep 2014
Location: Europe
Posts: 223
Quote:
Originally Posted by Suraya View Post
My last session with T was so horrible. I have been very depressed and my emotions and have been all over the place. I have C-PTSD and abandonment and trust issues and T knows this. The session started off on a bad foot and I could tell T was frustrated with me. I couldn't give her specifics why I was feeling so down - I really didn't know. She commented that if I was going to just say I was generally depressed and didn't know why then her suggestion to me would be to take a three mile run to feel better. So maybe she was just having an off day, too, right? They're allowed to have off days just like we are and maybe we just didn't connect that day but it only got worse. She then made a comment about how if she's not helping me anymore then maybe it's time for me to see a new therapist. This came out of nowhere. It really triggered my rejection issues and hurt. I've been seeing her for four years and have just started to really trust her and open up. We continued the session and talked about a different issue, but I left and this has been bothering me since. I can't help wondering if T wants to be done with me and is tired of me. I think I should bring it up with her but I'm afraid of confrontation and of hearing her tell me she can't work with me. I don't know what to do.
I'm very sorry to hear that you're hurt. I think you have some good reasons for that, even if your T didn't mean it that way. That first comment about the run... It feels to me as some helplessness, as if your T didn't really know what to say. And then it happens, people say stupid things from time to time.

When she said the thing about not helping you anymore, I agree that that's a painful thing. You have to let her know. From my own experience I know that holding things back out of a fear of rejection is not a good thing to do. you will keep wondering, it will stay stuck in your head and there might be an easy explanation. Because the session apparently didn't go very well and your T maybe wasn't fully present. You have to figure that out so that you can let go of it.

Good luck